Here’s a scenario: You’re a happily married man with a great wife, pretty ok kids and a very lucrative job. Your wife is pretty hot and gives decent enough head that you can comfortably unwind at the end of the day, so you’re into it. But then Rihanna declares to the world that she wants to bang you. Yes, not just any Rihanna, THE bad girl Riri. But, if you bang her, the whole world is going to know. Your wife will probably leave you. But also, you’ll be the guy who banged Rihanna. So the question is: Would you do it? That’s the question Lebron is probably asking himself right now after Rihanna took to Instagram to show her support for him going into Game 7. She did this before, locking in her support after the Cavs beat the Raptors in Game 2 of that series.
And then she went back on last night to remind people she wants a piece of that ass.
I mean, she has to want to sleep with him. Right? Lebron is probably to women what Rihanna is to us. The untouchable Great White Buffalo. If I was famous, I would totally throw my support for the person who I most wanted to climb into bed with. Not because I actually cared about their accomplishments, but because it’d be so much easier to woo them when we’re celebrating rather than when they’re crying. “Oh I’m sorry you lost. You know what would probably make us both feel better? 69ing.” Gotta be Rihanna’s whole angle here. I mean, if I were Lebron, you wouldn’t have to put a gun to my head to “allow” Rihanna to sleep with me.